My mom used to say “I just want you to find someone to love.”
My partner tells me “You are so sweet to me. You are being so sweet to me.”
It turns out that I enjoy being gushy. I enjoy being a completely goofy romantic. There are so many fun sweet things to say and do and make.
With no fear that I’m going to be laughed at. With no fear that I’m going to be misunderstood.
I want to give that ooey gooey melty center to someone who knows what it means, what it costs, what the associated fears are.
I love getting to be that drippy heart, it’s such a treat to get to show it on my sleeve. It takes a lot of practice to feel comfortable being that person in front of someone, even when it’s so graciously and appreciatively received. It is shockingly hard to push that edge for myself. But I can feel it already being so worth it.