Vows to Mr. Fox

My beautiful friend LillianLemoning likes to bring up the following 500 Days of Summer quote pretty often.

Tom: Look, we don’t have to put a label on this – on us. It’s just, I need consistency. I need to know you won’t wake up tomorrow and feel a different way.

Summer: I can’t promise you that. Nobody can.

I think one of the things I love so much about the movie is how honest Summer is.  Sure she breaks Tom’s heart but she never tells a lie.  She has feelings and follows them and says them out loud and if the guy she’s seeing gets his heart broken because he wasn’t listening hard enough well, maybe he should have listened harder.

Lil loves to point out that Summer is right in this scene.  No one can promise their feelings will never change, regardless of what Hallmark wants us to believe.  A sentiment that Cliff has so eloquently made mention of as well.

Inspired by those musings and a sort of vow of honesty I’ve taken in the last few years I decided to write some promises I can keep to Mr. Fox.

I can’t promise I’ll never stop loving you but I can promise I’ll never tell you I love you when I don’t or that I don’t when I do.

No one can promise that they won’t wake up in the morning different, and wanting different things.  But I promise you that I will never keep you in the dark, I will never hide how I feel from you and I will never lie about those feelings.

It’s not a lot but it’s what I’ve got.  Want me to promise you more?  I can’t promise you that. Nobody can.

Love, the future Mrs. Fox

Bodies, Hope, Intimacy

Someone Like You…To Pet

I wish I was doing this right now.

Anyone who knows me knows how much I love to play with hair.  Sometimes guys react to this like they’ve never encountered it before.  Why do you think that is?  Do you play with hair?  What reactions do you get?  Do you like having your hair played with but no one ever does it for you?  Do people do it and usually it sucks which is why it’s so nice when someone does it right?

I’m curious and want someone to pet.


Right Under My Feet Is Air Made Of Bricks

I’m in a strange and new place with strange and new friends who I’m slowly starting to love.  Unfortunately, though, they are obsessed with love.  I’m starting to find that most people I meet, at least people I meet who are near to me in age, are obsessed with love.  Maybe they’re normal for being this intent on love, marriage and babies and I’m just odd for spending so little of my time thinking about it.  Sometimes I seriously think that this makes me…broken.

This is how I feel when I close my eyes lately.  Imagining being held by someone out there who I haven’t met yet, who I cannot see yet and who doesn’t know I exist yet.  Someone who’s arms fit perfectly around me and who’s neck begs to be lightly petted by my fingers.

On good days this is the most time I spend thinking about love.  On bad days I spend a lot of time asking myself questions like this.  Is everyone else crazy and narcissistic for spending so much time asking for my opinion about their relationship or am I broken for not caring enough about my romantic future?

Mr. Fox I’m waiting for you.  And I think it’s to my credit that I have other things to think about all day than just you.

Bodies, Deviant/Default, Man Meat

Hey Hot Stuff

Mr. Fox will have this exact hair.
I want to see as many sexualized male bodies as female bodies in the kinky/sex positive community, as an indication that we agree that diversity is beautiful, that we are, in fact, sex positive and at the forefront of challenging “the norm”. I want club nights designing fliers to consider having a variety of male bodies on their images. I want galleries to show men tied up or tying, being spanked, standing tall in their leather boots- and I want these images to not be ones created for the gay male community and then pushed at women. I want to see faces in agony and pleasure. I want to see erect cock. I want to challenge the knee jerk reaction that “female bodies are just more attractive”.

That quote is directly about the kinky community but I love the idea of ‘I want to challenge the knee jerk reaction that “female bodies are just more attractive”.’

Because I don’t know about you, but I disagree with it.

I’ve heard men talk about how they see going down on a woman as radical and political.  Sometimes that’s how I think about enjoying pictures of men. And let me just say that it’s not like these pictures are nearly as racy as still images of women I’ve come across without even trying (although…).

It’s one thing to tell me what I can or can’t look at.  But to tell me what I can or can’t like is patronizing and rude.

Women aren’t just naturally sexier than men.   To say that gives credence to the idea that, like Smurfette, we’re just the sexy version of men and I refuse to believe that.  Women and men are just people that other women and men find sexy.

That’s it.  That’s the anti-patriarchy message for today.  I think you’re hot.

Now try telling me that all those feminists are just man-haters.

And if these pictures aren’t to your taste check here or here or here for some more ‘fantasy research.’


Carry This Picture For Luck

Dear Mr. Fox,

Once upon a time I was like this girl Amelie, and

And then you came along and now


And I don’t have to choose to spend my time alone because

So now I… Well,

Because I think you look like

So just spend time with me even when I’m boring

Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter during the filming of Alice in Wonderland

And even though

I think you’ll also see that

And I could apologize in advance for being

Or warn you that

Or try to explain that

But the truth is that finally

And I’m glad you’re here because it’s scary.


Mr. Fox

One day I’m going to marry Mr. Fox.

I don’t know what his actual name will be but for my current purposes his name is Mr. Fox.

Here are some things Mr. Fox will do.

Mr. Fox will love garlic.

Mr. Fox will love my obnoxious laugh.

Mr. Fox will be a photographer and play at least one instrument but NOT consider himself an artist.

Mr. Fox will not be mad when I wake him up at ungodly hours of the morning.

Mr. Fox will never make me listen to techno.

Mr. Fox will appreciate my love of showtunes and think I have the voice of an angel.

Mr. Fox will not mind when I ask him to explain football…again.

Mr. Fox will not mind when I act like this:

And will understand that the correct response to this is orange juice and a massage.

I’ll be here.  Meeting other people.  Knitting and partying and kicking butt in various ways.