Uncategorized

Empowered By You

I’ve been wanting to review these for a while and haven’t gotten around to it.

So here goes.

Empowered By You makes the softest, most comfortable, most invisible underwear I’ve ever worn.

Last year I bought two pairs thinking I might give one away as a gift but then I tried one on and got selfish.

The underwear is unfortunately pretty pricey because a percentage of each purchase is essentially a Kiva loan for a woman starting a small business.

I also find it annoying that all the ads feature skinny white women being sexy while all the pictures of women receiving the microfinance loans are old women from countries like india, swathed in fabric.

All in all, if you want to buy me a birthday present for about 20 bucks and you don’t feel too weird about it being panties I prefer the thongs in Small/Med and I already have purple and beige.

Oh yeah, did I mention they come in bright, fun colors too?

Uncategorized

Abortifacient

I’m not a linguist.

I have a few friends who (whup my ass in scrabble and) are linguists. They like to look up the origins of Farsi and remind me that it has no connection to Hebrew (unlike Arabic) even though the alphabet looks the same and then tell me the historic reasons why.

But I can’t do that. I just like spelling.

And some words I think are inherently beautiful, even regardless of their meanings.

I remember when I was a kid hearing a story about a woman in a hospital giving birth and hearing the word ‘placenta’ for the first time and wanting to use it as her daughters name because she thought it sounded beautiful.

When I was a kid I loved the word aneurysm. I only vaguely understood the meaning but it just felt so good coming out of my mouth, halfway between a scream and a spell.

Some other words have gotten stuck in my head over the last few years. The Hebrew word for ‘watermelon’ has a lovely shape to it. My mom will always love the Spanish word for ‘spot remover’ and this morning I was listening to an episode of the Savage Love Podcast and Dan said the word ‘abortifacient.’ And, completely divorced from it’s meaning the word has been rolling around in my head all day.

I like the ratio of consonants to vowels. It’s fun to spell in sign language. And as a service to the word, which I’m sure doesn’t get much love in every day use I’m devoting 265 words to it right here.

Uncategorized

What To Do, What To Do

I can move myself across the country.  I can do it and survive.  Without a plan.  I swear I can.

And I do not like green eggs and ham.

“I’ll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.”
— Mae West
“Sometimes you hit a point where you either change or self destruct.”
— Sam Stevens
And really,
I just need to remember that
And come to terms with the fact that
And decide that it doesn’t make me a bad person.  Just a person with options.
Uncategorized

Happy 100th!

This is my 100th post!

I wanted to celebrate by writing lots of beautiful things about believing in love.  Then I decided that’s not me.  That I should put up something I really believe in.

So, behold, things I believe in.

If you want to talk to someone, you should call them.  Don’t assume that it’s not your place because you’re the girl.  Grow a pair of ovaries, pick up the phone and call.
~Me!

And this

Anonymous: don’t you think the feminist propaganda is overplayed and childish?

I obviously don’t think that, mostly because it’s neither of those things.  So, you have three options:
1) Talk to me without clicking anonymous and have a real adult conversation.
2) Continue to frustrate yourself by reading opinions that you don’t agree with and can’t wrap your narrow mind around.
3) Unfollow me

Thanks.

And this

“Good sex is like good bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.”
– Mae West

And why not

Things I actually care about.  Enjoy.  Care about things.

Gender, Uncategorized

What To Wear? What To Wear?

It started with a dress.

And a teeny tiny waist.

Then a class where we talked about corsets.

And what they did to women’s bodies during the 19th century.  How women lived with perpetually fractured ribs and displaced organs in the race to a tiny waist.

How uteri (yes, I looked that up because I had no idea what the plural of uterus was) were pushed out of the vagina under the weight of so much clothing.

You could say we’ve gotten away from this now that many women dress like this

But if you ask Stacey and Clinton or any straight man, they’ll tell you to accentuate your waist.  Make it look smaller.  Perhaps like this

Or if you go to my school, maybe like this

We can say that this is fashion paying homage to women’s bodies.  The sexy nature of our curves…

OR

Now, into the technical.

There is a difference between sex and gender.

Merriam Webster has this to say on gender.

2b : the behavioral, cultural, or psychological traits typically associated with one sex.

And this to say on sex.

1: either of the two major forms of individuals that occur in many species and that are distinguished respectively as female or male especially on the basis of their reproductive organs and structures

Sex is something you don’t get much choice in.  You’re born with some parts and just need to deal with it throughout your life.

Gender is performative.

Which, according to my drama teacher means that it’s all pretend costumes and we can take it off whenever we want.

I’ll just let you think on that.

Most men can agree that this is hot

But this is pretty acceptable too

However (as much as I enjoy this) it’s not quite within the bounds of what society says a man can be.

All of this just to say that women can dress feminine and men can dress masculine.  But if a woman decides to dress more masculine she’s just being modern.  She’s being professional, elevated even.  Should a man decide to do something a little different…well…

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Awesome!

I love when things are awesome.  More than that I love when someone comes to me really excited about something I didn’t notice before.  That’s what this website is.  http://1000awesomethings.com 1000 awesome things that I hadn’t noticed before.  And new ones every day.

Ever noticed how great wind is?  I didn’t.  And then these guys gave me 3 great reasons.  Gosh, I love the wind, and I totally forgot.  Now when the wind blows I’ll smile instead of cursing Pittsburgh and its car killing hills.

What about Correctly guessing the secret ingredient? That’s a good one.  Lots of awesomeness in there.

But what about finding out someone has the same birthday as you?  Or when you sneeze and fart at the same time so nobody notices the fart?

Every day these guys make my life awesome.  Because they open my eyes to the awesome all around me.

Go have an awesome friggin day!

Uncategorized

Don’t Bite The Hand That Feeds

So I’m taking this religion class now and we finally got to Christianity.

When Christianity began it was a small sect of Judaism and it was outlawed.  Within 400 years it became a huge national religion.  In class today we learned why that was.  And the answer was: WOMEN.

This is really oversimplified but I haven’t got all day so here goes:  Pre-Christianity women were in low supply.  There were 130 men for every 100 women (We’re currently somewhere around 105:100).  Female babies were frequently subject to “exposure” which basically means that your husband didn’t want to pay to feed her so he took your baby and left it on a rock outside of town.  And you were probably 14 years old anyway and illiterate so what could you do about it?  Abortions were also quite common and killed MANY women.

So to recap: Before Christianity basically you would sit at home and do…domestic arts…until your 35 year old husband came back from whatever fun stuff he did that day and got you pregnant.  And then he could choose whether or not to end your pregnancy by poisoning you or shoving rocks into your uterus (oh yeah, you’d probably die too) if he wanted.

Basically what I got out of class today is that Christianity gave women more agency over their bodies.  Women flocked to this new religion that usually resulted in a longer lifespan.  And now it tries to take away our rights to our bodies.

This religion took off because it gave women more agency over their bodies.  Agency to keep their babies, their lives, their fertility.  Christianity was raised on the backs of mothers.  And now it has grown up and commits matricide.

I don’t mean to sound preachy but this class really got my blood boiling.

Uncategorized

Why Wasn’t I Invited?

Dane Cook has this thing about relationships.

When you don’t have love, it’s like there’s a party going on, and everybody was invited, except for you. And you just happened to be walking by that house in the rain… (sigh) “I wasn’t invited to this party.” But then, once you’re IN love, that’s like being inside that party, going “Where’s my jacket? I wanna get outta here. where’s my jacket? I been to this party six years and I wanna see other parties! Where’s my jacket. Someone shit on the coats. I think someone shit on, about, or around the coats.”

Alright so he’s coming at it from a different perspective.  He’s been in 6-year long parties before and I have not.  I’m currently walking past the party on the way to work in the pouring rain holding a ton of homework and everyone I know is inside the party…making out with someone.

I don’t want to complain.  But I’d really appreciate an invitation every once in a while.

So for now I’ll just tell myself to shut up and believe. 

That’s an acceptable response to sadness right?