More Appreciation

5 Nov

A few weeks ago I wrote about this guy in my life. Because I was thinking of him that day, just cause, just to be appreciative for the good things in my life.

And after the post came out I started wondering if it made sense to other people. I have a lot of guys in my life who aren’t exactly relationships but who are really important to me for one reason, one experience, one night, one statement or another.

Today I thought I’d pay homage to another and the lesson he taught me.

A few years ago, when I first got the OKCupid app I was heading to a birthday party and perusing the app to kill time. I spied the cutest thing I’ve ever seen and sent him a message immediately. Turns out he was from California and had just one more night in New York.

I invited him to meet me at the bar the party was at and once he got there and I had put in some face time with the birthday person I focused my attention on him.

He was just as cute and smart and charming as he seemed online. He had represented himself perfectly, he was just as tall and skinny and knobby-kneed as in his pictures. He was just as self-deprecating and witty as his profile. I was so hooked.

We took off to find a place to go make out for a while. The finding a place was shenanigans in and of itself but all the intimacy was lovely.

The next day he flew back to California and we rarely talk now but he pops up on my facebook feed every once in a while to remind me what a cute face he has.

Why do I cherish this memory? What did I learn that night that brings me such joy?

I learned that I can be attracted to someone and make all the first moves and have them all be seriously appreciated and reciprocated, that contrary to what some of my friends say there are guys who appreciate that. It’s okay that I’m the brave one and also happen to be the one with the vagina.

Also, my attraction to someone physically and intellectually doesn’t need to be ignored because of something so petty as time or space.

For one night I adored him and he adored me. Just because we didn’t date for a while and then burst into flames does’t mean it wasn’t important.

Length of a relationship doesn’t always correlate to quality.

No wonder I think of him so fondly.

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