Around new years I went through a really needy phase. I don’t know why but it seemed like all my friends were. Maybe it was the holiday hangover. Maybe it was all the not hearing from the guys we were seeing, but for whatever reason it seemed like every single friend of mine spent the first week of 2014 sending questionable, unreturned texts to people who had seen them naked in 2013.
And then something pretty cool happened. The people on the other end of those phones started responding.
Now it’s no secret that I’m seeing multiple people these days and all of them got a pretty equal amount of unsolicited correspondence.
The first finally got back to me and told me basically that I needed to back off. I was texting too much, expecting too much, I was just too much. And to be fair, he’s a bit too little (in the interesting personality department, get your mind out of the gutter) so I’m not surprised that this was the straw that broke him.
The next responded the next morning “Hey! Sorry I thought I’d responded. You’re not crazy. What’s up?”
And the last called yesterday. “Sorry I’ve been AWOL, I’ve been out of town. I’m not avoiding your calls, I promise.”
The point is that I treated all of these guys the same way. I was just me. Me at my neediest. Live and in living color.
And for the guys for whom I’m worth that price of admission, it wasn’t even slightly a problem.
It just served as a pop quiz, “do you like me enough to be worth my emotional time?”
No, Yes, Yes.
Cool. I’ll adjust my expectations accordingly.
The point is:
Be your crazy self. Let’s face it, you’re going to eventually anyway. Anyone who doesn’t want to deal with that isn’t someone you should deal with.