The other day a bunch of my distinguished colleagues and I were drinking at a bar when one person looked around at us all and dubbed us each bottom, top, or switch. I myself was quite pleased to be labeled a switch as 1) I think it’s a bit of an honor, and 2) it shows how well she knows me.
Today I ran into an old classmate on the way to work and we got to catch up for a bit. It was really nice, I love feeling like New York is a tiny place, because it is.
This lady is an alpha female. She holds the power and she doesn’t like anyone who makes her feel otherwise. In fact she was telling me a story about being interviewed by another alpha personality and how upon entering the room and shaking this woman’s hand she knew she lost the job because they’d just be competing for the whole hour.
One of my greatest attributes as a friend, a coworker, or a lover is that I’m a switch.
In truth, in the long term I don’t like it when someone makes me feel like I can’t have it both ways. I get bored of anyone who makes me feel like I have to be on all the time just as much as I get bored of anyone who makes me feel like I’m never allowed to win.
But in a work situation I can swing between not treading on the alpha dog’s toes and making enough strong decisions to keep the pups in line.
It’s my good fortune to be a switch. To be able to work with all sorts of people in all sorts of ways. To be open-minded and willing to try. To be a blank slate and a box of opinions.