Dating, Intimacy, Relationships

Some people underestimate how erotic it is to be understood. – Mary Rakow

At work yesterday I was talking to one of the girls in the cast when she said “I don’t plan to ever break up with the guy I’m with now but if I did…” and I thought, ‘well, enjoy that.’ Because as much as I adore The Yankee (and each day I truly adore him more and more) I don’t see myself raising my beautiful Jewish babies with him. I have a lot more dating left in me.

Later at the bar I told some of my friends this story and one of them agreed (by virtue of a subtle beer clink) with me in reference to his girlfriend. And I had a realization. One of the reasons why the Yankee is my Yankee instead of my boyfriend is that “Boyfriend” is a term reserved for people who are on their way to spouse (like that actress’s boyfriend is) and the Yankee isn’t that. My friend’s girlfriend wasn’t on track to be his wife, but by letting her use the term he (admitted with his words that he) was letting her believe she was.

Every once in a while I catch some slack for dating a guy for 4 months and managing to still “keep it casual.” But I like to think that in some ways my relationship is enhanced because of it. I’m not lying to him. I’m being more honest with him than a lot of my friends are being with their titled significant others.

I like not lying, it makes me feel really good. And fortunately The Yankee likes it too.

I demand unconditional love and complete freedom. That is why I am terrible.

– Tomaz Salamun

1 thought on “Some people underestimate how erotic it is to be understood. – Mary Rakow”

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