I Hate Myself A Little Bit

21 Jan

I’m a big fan of the phrase

Feelings are inherently valid.  You have a feeling?  Ta Da!  Valid.  You’re reacting to something on a TV show that never actually happened?  Still valid.  You’re reacting to a perceived slight?  Still valid.  That feeling came out of you, and just like any other shit that comes out of you, it’s real.  Generally my friends agree with me but there’s just one type of feeling people have a hard time with.

Sometimes when I have a feeling it’s accompanied by guilt and makes me hate myself a little bit.  People always have the same reaction to that.

“Don’t hate yourself.” “No, don’t do that.” “You can’t blame yourself for that.” “It isn’t your fault.”

“Stop that.”

I know it isn’t my fault.  I’m well aware.  I know that I’m hating myself because I’m feeling guilty for not feeling as bad as I momentarily think I should be feeling.  I know it’s a little ridiculous.  But it’s my feeling and it’s valid.  And I don’t want to apologize for it.

So I’m sorry for being sad at you.  I’m sorry for making you feel bad.  But I am absolutely not

One Response to “I Hate Myself A Little Bit”

  1. Anonymous January 21, 2013 at 3:20 pm #

    Good for you. Sad and sorry are true feelings we are always entitled to. It is what we do about it that can help us later on. Love you.

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