Sex Is No Accident

16 Apr

We like to believe that sex arises from an impulse of inclination that is natural, unprompted, and artless. This suggests our impatience with seduction and playful eroticism, which take up too much time, require too much effort, and—most important—demand full consciousness of what we are doing. As long as sex is something that ‘just happens,’ you don’t have to claim it.

— Esther Perel, Mating in Captivity

Contrary to what a lot of people would have you believe, sex doesn’t just happen.  Obviously I can’t speak for all people all over the world, but truly when people say ‘it just happened’ I don’t get it.

I want to be an active participant in the sex I have, not just outside myself watching it.  I want to claim it.

Oh, and I also don’t want to get pregnant.  So don’t be an idiot.

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