Rejected Boy Syndrome

20 Oct

Last night I was spending time with a certain guy friend of mine.

He’s a big nerd.  He’s a computer science major.  He types like it but if you saw him walking down the street you would never snicker to your friend and say “I bet he sits in his room playing WOW instead of showering.” He was saying that sometimes he feels like he’s too much of a geek for girls to like.  And suddenly a theory was born.

At some point some girl told him that she didn’t like him because he was a geek.  And since then every time a girl rejects him he assumes it’s for the same reason.  “Oh gosh, I must still be too dorky.”

My friend Izzy responded to my post about the concept of Gold diggers and made an interesting point.  He pointed out that these guys who really believe in gold diggers  were told at some point that they were too poor to date.  And since then every time a girl rejects them it’s “I’m too poor.  That’s the problem.”

So even though the most recent girl who dumped him only did so because he was a really bad kisser/smelly/whiny/whatever Rejected Boy is going to assume it’s because he’s dorky/poor/short/whatever.

Sound familiar yet?  It’s because you probably have one.  What’s yours?  Too fat?  Too smart?  Too loud?

That rejection was a suggestion this idiot made at the time:  You’re too loud.  Be less loud and people will like you more.

How long ago was that?  And most importantly:

Is that advice helpful to you anymore?  If it’s not, then let it go.

2 Responses to “Rejected Boy Syndrome”


  1. Attack Unhelpful Thoughts « Female Gazing - December 28, 2012

    […] always remember, if you’re having a thought and it isn’t helpful to you, let it go. […]

  2. I’m In A Funk | Female Gazing - May 29, 2015

    […] When I was a kid it was helpful when I threw a fit, “Did you eat today? Do you have clothes on your back? Do you have shoes on your feet? Good, I thought so. Stop crying and do your homework please.” But as an adult now, that qualifies as advice that isn’t always helpful. […]

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