Singing

26 Sep

I love to sing.  In fact a day when I don’t sing, even just in the elevator, is a really bad day.  I’m in a singing class that meets once a week and last night I got to spend some time with a friend who is also in that class.  He has a marvelous voice.  He sounds like a key lime pie with blueberries on top, sweet and fresh.

But he thinks he’s a bad singer.  He signed up for the class to dare himself to sing.  I was shocked.  How could he not be able to hear what I could hear.  And then he said it, his parents reinforced year after year, day after day, that he was horrible.  Drilled it into his head, you could never do this, you aren’t good enough, you should quit wasting your time.

...The bad stuff is easier to believe, you ever notice that?" ~Pretty Woman

Just hearing this brought tears to my eyes.  My mom, and both of my grandmothers were singers.  And my mother for a long time also led me to believe that I was a bad singer.  All I ever wanted to do was this and she told me to give up because I sucked.

Then one day some singers I knew told me I had a great voice and should go see their teacher.  I got up the courage to ask my mom to send me to lessons.  She laughed at me but agreed to pay for it and since then I’ve just decided that on this subject, her opinion doesn’t matter and never will (unless she says I have the voice of an angel, then of course I will reconsider).  If she can’t hear the fabulosity of me then sucks for her.

For me it’s singing, for you it’s painting?  swimming?  writing?  Everyone has something that they wanted to do but got talked out of.

Parents are the worst offenders, we put a lot of stock into what they think.  They’re supposed to love and support us, so when they disapprove of something we do, hobby, lifestyle, sexuality, it’s especially hard to handle.  “Why would they lie to me?  Why would they want me not to do this thing that makes me happy?  They must be really telling me the hard truth.”  I can’t tell you why, only that they’re wrong.  I’m right and they’re wrong.

From the 2003 movie Camp:  When I was eight years old I told my dad that I wanted to take an acting class. He said, “There are five billion people in this world, if one-tenth of 1% of them wanted to be actors, that would still be five million people. Do you really think you’re prettier than five million people? You’re not even the prettiest girl in your class.”

Be strong and do what you want.

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