When I was a kid my mom had a friend that always wanted “Better”. His microwave broke? Time to get the next size up. More features, more perks, more digital, more fancy. You know; “Better.”
At my house our oven broke and we got one the same size because a bigger one is actually an inconvenience. The iron broke and we got a smaller one because it was better at sleeves. But we had specific priorities. The oven had to be a specific height so dad didn’t have to lean over. We didn’t need the newest model, just the one that was wall mountable and the right width.
We got one that fit our lives. We were setting our own standards. What is important to me? What am I looking for from this? What are my priorities? Self-cleaning? Portable? Wireless?
It’s like how you don’t just go to the store and buy the biggest vibrator you can find. You figure out if what you want first. Is it a vibrator or a dildo? then you figure out what you’re looking for from it; intense rumbles or a big enough handle to rock it back and forth? Does the handle need to be comfortable from your vantage point or your partners? That’s why there are so freaking many options.
When I tell people I write a feminist blog sometimes they tell me something crazy; that some women just want to be mothers and I’m a big meanie for trying to dissuade them.
Hilarious. Quite the contrary. I don’t want everyone to run out and try to get the same life I want. That would be entirely too much competition. I want people to use their own standards and figure out their priorities and then go after the things they want. If that’s kids then great, if it’s presidency then great.
My feminism is about all people having access to the careers and options that make them happy regardless of their sex, gender, race, class, etc.
That’s why mandatory maternity leave for CEO’s is just as important as respecting the rights of caregivers.
I believe in a feminism that encourages all people to make the decisions and chase the dreams they find within themselves. We need to remember that housework is just as important as bread winning. As long as we consider child rearing petty ‘women’s work’, the patriarchy is winning. And we can’t have that now can we?